Unique Has No Comparative

[From the ineluctable, password-protected Jhames, a meme:]

[10 Things That Make Me More Unique Than You.

1. I’ve only ever lived in towns with Spanish missions.
2. My first name is more pretentious than yours. (And my family has a history of wacky naming...)
3. I know all the words to “If A Girl Answers (Don’t Hang Up)” by Vanity 6.
4. I visited the U.K. the year of the Queen’s Silver Jubilee (1977), and the year of her Golden (2002). And not once in between.
5. I still speak fluently what the teenage girls on the next street called “carnie.” Eezit eezis seezomewheezat leezike Deezoubeezle Deezutch. I want someone else to speak it with.
6. I’m somewhat less fluent in French, even though I got a 4 on the Advanced Placement test many years ago.
7. I can name all the state capitals, the U.S. presidents, and kings and queens of England in order. That and $3.00 gets me a small latte.
8. I don’t care who you sleep with, as long as they don’t hurt you.
9. I’m used to feeling invisible, though recent events suggest I may have to get used to something else.
10. You choose to read me.]

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