The Last Dream Before Waking

[It's a rainy afternoon (no, not in 1990). I'm driving my mother into a parking lot where dozens of cars are chaotically parked. The lot services a low, long building that seems to be sided with corrugated aluminum; it looks like something out of a factory or dingey office park. We're listening to the radio report on a major scandal involving government secrets and FedEx. The scandal is the reason we're parking and hurrying into the building.]

[Mom takes the entrance on the left, while I take the one on the right. I kick empty FedEx boxes out of my way as I proceed to a door on the left. I open the door, and let Laurence Tribe wheel in ahead of me. He sets his brown briefcase on the floor of a room where two dozen reporters stand looking at some obscured VIPs in front. I step past Tribe to a door on the other side of the room. Trying to be inconspicuous, I walk over and find my mother walking in.]

["Tom Harkin has cleared Elizabeth Berkley of any wrongdoing," she whispers to me as we make our way to an empty space amid the reporters.
"Good."
"And I put the Cokes in a fridge in the other room."
"Thanks."]

[Suddenly, a Voice from the front of the room rings out.
"And who might you be?"
"I'm Bill Sharp. I'm Senator ___'s aide."
"You don't look old enough to be anybody's aide."
"I'm 36. Do you want to see my driver's license?"
"No. And the lady?"
"I'm his mother."
Another Voice: "Sir, this conference is hardly secret. Let the whole Sharp family in if they want." And then I woke up.]

[This dream was a continuation of one earlier in the night also involving the FedEx scandal, and starring both Clintons, Allison Janney, and a stream of toilet paper hanging out the rear left passenger door of Janney's car.]

[OK, first? Thanks for the flattery of my youthful visage, but I won't be 36 for another three weeks. What's the rush, Mr. Subconscious? And B.: while I admit my mother has made occasional appearances in my dreams over the years (no comments, please), my soda pop addiction, Tribe, and Berkley are to my knowledge unprecedented.]

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