Hell Is Other People

[Irritating me today and every day:]

[*ring ring*]

[Me: Good morning/afternoon, Place Where I Work.]

[Caller: Hi, how are you?]

[Me (Deadpan, but thinking, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU CARE?! THIS IS A BUSINESS CALL!!! YOU DON'T KNOW ME FROM ADAM'S ULCERATED OX, ASSHOLE!!!!): ... Fine. How are you?

[And so on. Look. There is one correct way to respond to someone you call for business purposes after they've answered the phone: state your name and your place of business. You may also ask to speak to someone you believe works at the company you've called, or to a particular department. After some sort of polite sound acknowledging that the person whom you've called has taken in your oh-so-vital vitals, then you may begin to explain what it is you want. Do it in small, easily interruptible pieces, because I may just have to cut in and transfer you to someone who gives a damn.]

[This is how it should go:]

[*ring ring*]

[Me: Good morning/afternoon, The Place Where I Work.]

[Caller: Hi, this (first name & last name) from (Place Where Caller Works.)]

[Me: How can I help you/Yes?/*grunt*.]

[OK? OK.]

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