Totally Tanenbaum

[Sunday, lovely Sunday up at the parents'. After two of Sean's special gimlets at Martuni's and a spectacular dinner with both Dennis and plenty of sake at a Japanese hole in the wall near my place on Saturday night, I thought I wasn't going to be up and ready for my sister and niece to pick me up the next morning; however, I was surprisingly unbloodshot and cheerful when they pulled up. Clear skies, cool air...a perfect winter's day for a trip to the country.]

[Discussion in the car mostly covered our jobs and how to know if we're underpaid and what to do about it. I wonder if some families have the culture of going after money built into them, because despite my parents having owned their own businesses, and retiring off the proceeds of the second, neither Kate nor I have any moneymaking instincts whatsoever.]

[The raison de voyager a week before Christmas was to indulge in the bizarre tradition of going to a tree farm to cut down a living tree, prop it up dying in the familial living room, cover it with plastic trinkets and little lights, secure in the knowledge that it'll end up on the compost pile in a few weeks. We hadn't done this as a family probably since Kate and I were in high school, but the tiredest of holiday traditions seems new again with the Niece Audrey among us. So Mom, Dad, Kate, Audrey and I drove up in two cars like good Californians to Kenwood, one of those little NorCal hick-burgs-turned-boutiquevilles, and after a great Italian lunch (Cafe Citti; check it out next time you're up there), we pulled into this "farm" off Highway 12 right there by the old folks' suburb of Oakmont. ]

[OK, first...the attendant was this cute nerd about my age with whom I'd totally have lingered if my family hadn't been there. He caught my occasional interested glances and returned them, but since Kate, Audrey and I arrived together, I couldn't tell whether he thought I was a closeted husband or what. In any event, I made sure look him in the eye and give a firm, Boy-Scout-trained "Thank you" as he handed me the saw.]

[We didn't spend too much time on the "oh, we can't pick THAT one, we just got here" game before deciding on what Cute Nerd later identified for us as a sequoia...not a coast redwood, but the kind that if left to grow for thousands of years in the Sierra Nevada would be the biggest tree in the world. Instead - Sharp compost pile after three weeks covered with lights and trinkets.]

[I sawed the whole thing down myself as Dad fumbled with the video camera and my sister sang "I'm A Lumberjack (And I'm OK)" from Monty Python. It didn't take long as the wood was much softer than the usual evergreens we used to pick. Maybe Cute Nerd had better saws than Christmas Tree Farms Of Yore had, who knows? We loaded it on Dad's truck and back down the highway we went. Back home, Dad seemed to need three different saws and twelve different drill bits to make the thing fit in the stand and in the living room. For me, that kind of fuss is unbearable (the wine came out at about that point); for him, it's fun.]

[The rest of the afternoon and evening went smoothly. I got to have my probably once-yearly binge on Dungeness crab, thanks to Mom, and the niece liked it, too, as she'd liked the bits of anchovy I'd slipped her from my fantastic Caesar salad at lunch. If Audrey doesn't like any foods later on, it won't be because her family has failed to expose her to them.]

[I decided to let them all know that I'm doing something to get my head straight, and they were supportive. Our family has very little experience with formal treatment for mental or emotional bumps in the road...the fact that I'm calling whatever's been up with me "bumps in the road" is revealing in itself. But they've been worried about me...oh, since 1973 or so, and they seemed pleased to hear that I'm taking a tentative step or two.]

[Kate, following her talent, had me and the baby all wrapped up and in her car, heading back for the city a little after 8 p.m. Her comment: "Well, that was relatively painless." I'd say it was a bit better than that.]

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